Things I learned as a new graduate nurse, and other stuff they don’t teach you in Nursing School
We all had to start somewhere! No matter what kind of job you have, at one point you were the newbie. You got picked on. You made mistakes. You might have looked like an idiot every now and then. It’s funny to look back and reminisce about all the ridiculous things I did as a new graduate nurse, and I don’t want to be the only one laughing at myself. It’s crazy to think that I have been an Emergency Room Nurse for 4 years. Where has the time gone? Anyway, here are some of the things I picked up a long the way:
1. NEVER give Beta-Blockers to a patient before they go for a stress test.
2. NEVER forget to disclose to the doctor that the patient had a run of V-tach!
3. ALWAYS have extra gauze when starting an IV to avoid a bloody mess, and so the patient doesn’t KNOW you are a new grad.
4. ALWAYS carry an extra 22 gauge IV needle in your pocket…..just in case you blow that 20 that you said you could nail with your eyes closed.
5. NEVER believe the patient when they say they just had a seizure while at the park… and they just happened to have an x-ray of their broken ribs that they would now like pain medication for.
6. ALWAYS pick up a patient’s hand above their face to see where it will fall if you think they are faking a seizure.
7. ALWAYS make sure that the IV piggyback is attached to the main line ABOVE the infusion pump….that way you don’t bolus the Vancomycin and give the patient Red man’s syndrome ;(
8. NEVER have a child’s parent hold them while starting an IV. That way comments from the parents such as “come on already,” or “why are you taking so long” (when it’s only been 2.5 seconds) can be avoided.
9. ALWAYS double glove when changing a patient that has diarrhea. You don’t want any accidents to happen in case your glove happens to rip when your patient is having a major blowout ;(
10. NEVER fart in the medication room if pulling up a lot of meds and anticipating that your coworkers will need to use it soon and might happen to walk-in after it smells like a garlic-skunk omelet….especially if you are the only one in the med room, making you GUILTY!
What can I say….the list goes on and on and I feel like I have barely hit the tip of the iceberg 
Might have to revisit this topic later!
Questions for you: What did you learn as a new grad.? Any fun stories?
Have a great day!!!
Nurse Frugal, #10 is just too much!! I never had a job where it was safe to fart.
It is interesting reading this; although I have no idea what most of it means, it makes me think back to internship time and the things I would do that would prompt my clients to say “you’re new, aren’t you?”
Yup to #6, had to do that a couple times as an ER and ped’s nurse! And #10, been there! Lol awkward…
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While I know nothing about nursing, I do know that they rarely teach you the really important stuff is school.
The hardest thing for me to learn in the real world has been office politics. Maybe you don’t have that as much in nursing (hopefully!). No funny stories I can think of, but wish it had been discussed more in school.
Hahaha #10 is hilarious, definitely something you can take away at other jobs too
Pretty sure this happened once in the office kitchen, and someone tried to cover it up by saying it was the sink…. BLEHH. Anyway, hope you had a great Christmas!!!!
The sluice is my #10 that way I can just say it was the bedpan washer!
Starting Nursing School in a month, #9 might be the most important thing I learned from all my work as a CNA. I worked with a lot of C. Diff patients and the double glove has saved me more than I care to admit.
Merry Christmas! You guys all look good in your picture. No 10 is not exclusive to nursing – there are a lot of places you think might be safe but really aren’t!
#9 Wow so gross! I like how everyone in the comments has experienced #10. I used to have my own office and this was still a problem…especially after lunch. lol!
Oh my gosh: a couple of these are way out there funny: #10 and #9. I could never be a nurse, but am sooo thankful to those of you who are!
My funny grad story is this: as a rookie reporter fresh out of college, I was sent on my first “big” controversial story about a labor union group and management duking it out over wage and working condition disputes. I interviewed the managers and in my excitement about getting interviews with the big-wigs, I ran back to the newroom to write up my exclusive, never mind that I completely forgot to get the workers’ perspective. I turned in my one-sided story and got my butt chewed out in front of the entire newsroom for such a fundamental error. Wow! But because I had a great editor, I didn’t get fired: I got an education!
That’s hilarious! What a great lesson
Getting yelled at in public is always a good reinforcement for a great lesson.
Laughed out loud when I read your post! Especially at #10
When I worked in the ICU, I would go into my patient’s room (the one who’s intubated and sedated) and let one rip. that way, no one will smell it! And if they did, they don’t know where it came from
That’s awesome!!! You know you still pull that when you put your patients under anesthesia……blame it on the sleeping patient
Of course!! The good thing is that we all wear masks in the OR lol!!
Love these! Glad you can laugh about it now. How about don’t prime your bags in a PTs dark room, half of it will end up on the floor.;)
Great post! So funny…..we have all been there. Good nursing jobs for new grads are hard to come by. I worked as a travel nurse for a few years before settling into my current location. Tips from a travel nurse – take notes and get a map of the hospital on your first day so you don’t get lost with a patient!